Unconditional love- is what comes to mind when you look at this lovey dovey picture.
A virtue animals possess but for us humans it doesn’t come that easily.
Is it really possible to love another being with no expectations in return except for asking that they love you back as deeply as you do? Would that suffice?
If one reaches this level of self actualization in any relationship, it is perhaps the best thing to happen as they are not bound to feel any disappointment, hurt, angst over their partner/ loved one not meeting their expectations.
But I do wonder if its really possible to achieve?
These are strictly my personal views, I feel when we start to love someone fiercely, it is but natural to expect things out of them, out of the relationship. Several people cross our paths in life, why is it then that only a handful leave their imprints in our hearts? From the rest , it makes perfect sense to not expect anything as its easier to shrug our shoulders and move on, “aahh that was a disappointment” but that feeling of being disappointment seldom lasts for long.
With loved ones its quite contrary.
But could we expect another person to really meet all our expectations, for all we know we could be having totally unrealistic expectations, or maybe they are realistic but not in the person’s control to fulfil. Are we being fair then to ourselves and them and to the love we share?
We often say a mother’s love is unconditional and the purest form that one can ever experience , but don’t we mothers have some expectations of our offspring? Or are we completely devoid of them?
How do we condition ourselves to have least expectations from people so that we do not have to face disappointment which often then seeps into the relationship and is bound to make our loved ones suffer along with us? Should we maintain a certain degree (a teeny weeny) bit of self restraint in loving someone which would then perhaps translate to not being so disappointed over expectations not being fulfilled?
But as someone I love once told me : “You are either all in or you are not, there s no middle ground here”
And this made perfect sense.
But being devoid of expectations and smashing them seems unachievable for me, though I know this means I am inviting disappointments for myself.
What are your thoughts around expectations in relationships and not just romantic ones? Is it possible to have zero expectations and want nothing but to be loved back in return?
Linking up with Vinitha who hosts #FictionModays , sorry I am a day late Vini but I hope you consider this! and share your thoughts too, I love reading your elaborate and insightful comments.
2 thoughts on “Smash ’em #FictionMondays”
I am sorry I couldn’t comment on your post last week, Akshata. I was not keeping well.
This is a vast topic. I have been thinking about love and I feel as I grow older the way I express my love is changing. That could also mean my expectations are also changing. I do believe in unconditional love. But I feel unconditional love is possible only toward our own children. Again, I am not sure if it stays that way forever. We are only mere mortals. What if everything comes with an expiry date, including how much love we feel.
I am not sure if I made sense here, Akshata. As I grow older, I am finding myself becoming more practical and realistic. I end up comparing notes from my 20s and 30s and I find mismatches. I call them my pearls of wisdom, but ultimately I find it discouraging that my perceptions are changing. Maybe, 40s will give me new insights to accommodate this disparity. Clearly, I am a lost soul who made your comment section a debate with my own torn self. Sorry about that. 🙂
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Aww Vini hope you feel better now girl. I am muddled about this topic too and find my thoughts changing with time and experience. I guess there is no one answer. I loved how you poured out your thoughts unfiltered