I was back to my native, the sleepy town Rhumpsa which seemed so cut off from civilisation.
This is the place I was born in, where I grew up, went to school, splashed in the muddy waters and climbed the mango trees.
This is where I had my first kiss and where I lost my virginity to Hans. I vividly remember the scorching heat when it was siesta time and the whole village was dozing off. Hans and I would steathily make our way to our favourite haunt- where the washermen hung the clothes to dry. There was a shed right behind and I tell you those crazy horny days are something which still give me a high.
I got a letter one day which changed my life forever, it was a ticket to a better life, more money and a promising future. I had won the scholarship and I moved to the big city. After toiling for 4 years in college, I secured a decent job and there was no looking back.
I moved my parents to the city, we bought a modest 1 bedroom flat and a Maurti car. Life was good.
I am young and beautiful, I met many young men and had quite a few relationships. No one could make me feel as good as Hans did in bed. I knew there was no looking back though unless I wanted to ruin my future and become a fisherman’s wife. I wasn’t that crazy to give up everything for some good sex.
Maria my childhood bestie was getting hitched and wanted me to be her bridesmaid. I couldn’t say no. So here I was, back to my native after almost a decade.
I bumped into Hans at the wedding and we both couldn’t take our eyes off each other. Ii was just like the old days, I could feel the palpitations. He invited me out for coffee the next day and I couldn’t say no.
It did feel a bit awkward at first but once we started talking about the old times, it felt like nothing had changed. We were at the same place where we had left. We went for a stroll after coffee. I laughed loudly when he shared a joke, tears streamed down my eyes.
His hand lightly brushed mine and I could feel the tension between us. Any moment now.
He looked at me, hesitating for a brief moment “Do you want to go and see that washerman’s wharf, some eventful days we spent there.” I smiled “Why not?”
I looked in awe , nothing had changed, perhaps the clothes were more trendier than they were a few years back.
“For old times sake?” he almost whispered and I nodded my head in agreement.
As we broke into spasms of sweat, I felt satiated. When was the last time I had felt so good? I looked at him, as he looked into my eyes and a terrible thought occurred to me. I hope this simpleton is not in love with me. I hope he’s not thinking of a relationship as thats the last thing I want. This is the last time, I am not doing this again. I don’t want to end up hurting him when I know my intentions very clearly.
I bade him goodbye, hoping never to see him again.
But we met again. And made love. Not once, but twice. It felt so magical. He looked into my eyes and held my hand. He was about to say something. “Don’t please don’t ” I prayed. I gotta stop this now. But I couldn’t stop it. Perhaps I was being selfish, thinking only about myself. I had extended my leave by 4 days and lied to my parents.
I knew this relationship had no future. I couldn’t leave the life I had painstakingly built and move to this sleepy town. Nor could he fit into my lifestyle in the city. He would be a fish without water. Plus we were as different as chalk and cheese. We wanted different things from life. Except for some good sex, we had nothing in common.
Each day I resolved to come out clean but I never could.
Finally it was time to bade goodbye. My vacations had come to an end. I had to join back.
I decided to come out with the truth “Hey this things is very common in the city, friends for benefits. No hard feelings, the sex was awesome but its time to go.” Maybe I should give him hug and a peck on the cheek. Or a handshake would be just fine. I hope he is not heartbroken.
I buy a bottle of red wine and go his house. I don’t want to do it in the wharf, where we shared such passionate moments. I wait till I see Mrs Gonsalves, his mom leave for the market and I knock the door. I keep a poker facer though my heart is thumping.
I can see his muscular frame as he comes towards the door. His face lights up like a puppy. “Hey Sandra so nice to see you, its a pleasant surprise. Come join us for tea. ”
This aint going well. I need to do this soon so that he has enough time to compose himself before his mother returns. She would be mad if she saw her grown up son shed copious tears.
He ushers me in before I can protest and leads me to the dining table.
“I want you to meet my wife Rosie and the twins Jamie and Jane.”
I look open mouthed as they all greet me.
I am participating in the Write Tribe Festival of Words 2018