Growing up #AtoZChallenge #BlogchatterA2Z

Posted in Aks Corner, AToZ Challenge 2018, family, Friendship, Love & Relationships, motherhood, Parenting

I got my first period when I was 11. It wasn’t a shock to me as I knew about periods when I was 4. One day  I saw Mumma take out a pad from the cupboard and walk towards the bathroom.

“What is that?” A curious 4 year old asked.

Grandma was sitting nearby. She immediately retorted. “Ah thats nothing, its Mumma’s diaper, you play with your doll” she tried distracting me.

Mumma walked toward me and explained “Myra , this is a pad. Just like you used to wear diapers as a baby , Mumma needs to wear this for 3-4 days every month. An egg is formed in Mumma’s body, its like the body is preparing for something. By end of the month the egg then breaks and blood comes out. Its nothing to worry about, it does not hurt Mumma but she needs to wear the pad just like you wear a diaper so that when you pee, the bed or sofa don’t get wet.”

As I grew up Mumma explained more details to me, so I was ready. There was no shame as not just Mumma but Daddy spoke about period as well to me.

Mumma also told me about “the birds and bees” – she told me about sexual abuse when I was as old as 2.5 and could comprehend things. We never used any code words for body parts. I knew I have a vagina and boys have a penis.

She seated me down one day and told me all about sex- it was like an adult to adult conversation though I was far from the age of an adult. She told me that sex is beautiful and both men and women enjoy it. The raging hormones in my body may send me mixed signals, but its important to think about the person with whom I want to have sex. I want it to be a memorable experience and not something I want to look back at with regret or bitter feelings. She hoped that I would confide in her like a friend, she couldn’t put tabs on me as I was a grown up girl. She wanted to give me freedom and she hoped I act responsibly. The most comforting part for me was when she said “Myra remember your Daddy and I are always there with you. Anything good or bad, its this place called home when you will always find a cup of your favourite chocolate milk and someone who will listen to you without judging you.”

These words still ring loud and clear in my ears. The day I want to celebrate my victory or simply rant or cry aloud because life has been unfair I know there is this one place that will never fail me. I wish every child gets this kind of a home.

Image source-ourpoetrycorner.

Linking up with #BlogchatterA2Z

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My theme for the challenge is

“A slice of life through Myra’s eyes” – a fictional tale of growing up and learning some vital lessons about self love, feminism, sisterhood, a working woman and the essence of being a woman in urban India.  

 

Published by Akshata Ram

Chartered Accountant, Story Teller, Dreamer, Voracious Reader, Blogger, Mommy to a little munchkin, Shopaholic, Day Dreamer.Passionate about my career in the corporate world and aspire to break the glass ceiling, at the same time nurture my passion for writing. My niche area is short stories, I also write on parenting, sexism, life's experiences, micro blogs and flash fiction. I have won the best Parenting blog post at mycity4kids.com the largest parenting website in India, 4 times and several of my posts have been published in the #MostPopular category on this site garnering millions of views. I also write on Bonobology, Rivo Kids, Women's Web and Youth Ki Awaaz. My blog has been chosen as the Top Indian Blogs for the years 2018-2019,2020 by TopIndianBlogs website and found a place in the prestigious Top 22 Indian Literary Blogs in 2020 @TopIndianBlogs.

45 thoughts on “Growing up #AtoZChallenge #BlogchatterA2Z”

  1. I love this AKS. That momma is ME. I dont have a girl to say these. But I have shared with A right from the beginning. I discuss almost anything to him and we do not have the barriers. Our family is an open book. Sometimes K asks me if i ever feet shy to explain these to him.. but honestly i never felt. lovely mom of myra:)

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    1. Thats awesome, kudos to you Deep. This story is imaginary, my parents never spoke to me about this matter but I so wish they had. I will make sure to be honest and transparent with my daughter

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  2. Well said, Akshata, it’s indeed necessary for the proper growth of children that parents tell them about pros & cons of a situation and let their children take the decision on their own and stand with them whether they take right or wrong decision.

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  3. This post can be used as a lesson for growing up kids. This is how we should teach our kids. My son also knows about periods and sex..I constantly keep teaching him good touch and bad touch. Good educative post Aks.

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  4. “Myra remember your Daddy and I are always there with you. Anything good or bad, its this place called home when you will always find a cup of your favourite chocolate milk and someone who will listen to you without judging you.

    You got beautiful parents..
    And I hope you lead the same beautiful life.

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  5. This is how mothers ought to empower their daughters by having a dialogue rather than hushing things under the carpet. Children would then share both their woes and joys with the parents. Great one Akshata.

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  6. Myra has lovely parents. The conversation here about periods reminded me of the conversation i had with my daughter when she was 3. we should be open with our kids and provide them emotional support without judgment and trust that we have raised them to be responsible.

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  8. This is great, Akshata. I hope i bond with my daughter as the mommy here.. I hope I am able to satisfy her curiosity as per her expectations.

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  9. Myra is blessed to have such parents who talk openly about issues and dont brush them under the carpet. Glad that they didnt avoid these conversations, which are usually considered uncomfortable. And also for giving her a home where she can just be!! Hope every child gets these.

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  11. Wow…Myra is lucky to have such parents…wish i had such parents and who had prepared me for everything…Hope every parent reads your blog and get inspiration and be great parents like Myra’s

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  12. It’s wonderful to know the feeling of home and someone is always there back at home to stand by you. It gives you the confidence to confide instead of sailing alone in the storm instead of setting high expectations and pressurizing your child to just excel. All the jargons and hiding and hype up are slowly changing now. Well written!

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  13. I do share all the knowledge with my children, specially about menstruation, good and bad touch, sex etc. Only intention behind it is to equip them to accept the things as part of life and not as something to fight with or shy off. Now a days I believe this awareness is seen in most of the households. We are changing for better!

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  15. Such an open ended conversation- not sure whether it’s good to have these concerns when the child is 2-3 years old but generally it’s far better for them to learn at home instead of mixed messages on the outside.

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  16. Nice little story.

    Although I personally think there is a certain age only after which sex education ought to be imparted, I think parents out to be approachable to their kids for all topics under the sun. That’s what harbours a feeling of mutual trust and transparency, and that’s how kids can become parents’ friends for life.

    Cheers,
    CRD

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    1. Thx for stopping by Chris, to be honest my parents never had this conversation with me and I do feel that I had to go through a lot of confusion in my growing years. Kids these days have much more exposure and are matured, its important to talk early

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      1. Well the problem with starting early in my opinion is that kids have impressionable minds. When you introduce something as sensitive as sex to them at an age like 5 or 6, it might make them aware, but it will also make them very curious. I personally wouldn’t want a child to lose his childlike-demeanour and innocence so early in life. Yeah, starting with things like inappropriate touch and how to respond/whom to approach for help at age 5 is right.

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      2. It’s should be age appropriate education . But one must not forget that children these days are exposed to things much faster and I would rather prefer they learn it from us than get mixed signs from the outside world

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  18. Exactly what I told Mishti when she asked me why I need to wear a diaper. Recently she again asked me how does a sperm meet the egg and I have asked for some time from her to find out the right way to explain it to her since it will require her to have a level of understanding considering the age she is in. I plan to explain it to her next month.

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