Its been a long and tiring day at work. The first week of the month for anyone working in finance is always a nightmare. Funnily we call it month end though its the start of a new month. That’s because we finalise the pnl and balance sheet of the firm for the prior month. Now I can’t complain about the month end which has become an integral part of life-when I signed up to become a CA, I knew this was in store.
So as I trudge home after a long and arduous day, talking to myself about what needs to be closed at work the next day and ticking off a mental checklist, I look at the watch and see its 11.30 at night. I open the door slowly, expecting my 2.8 year old is asleep and I hear a voice that’s the most melodious to my ears. “My mumma has come, Angel is waiting for you.” In a moment I have forgotten all about the pnl and suspense accounts as a little figure in pyjamas dashes out of the bedroom and envelopes me in a hug and kisses me.
They say life is never the same once you become a parent. You put everything else behind and the only thing that matters to you is your kid. In my case, the birth of my daughter has transformed my life big time but in ways different than what I always heard. I have started valuing myself more, the drive to succeed at work, my writing, be a better version of myself is even more.
As I once wrote, I don’t make sacrifices for my daughter as bringing her into this world was my wish. I would never want to use the word sacrifice to burden her. I stay away from her almost 10 hours a day at work, not just making money but also building my career, something that I am passionate about. While I am not at work, I do take time for myself- to indulge in my writing, reading, meeting up friends occasionally and having a life of my own. By emulating this behavior, I would want her to understand that being a woman, someone’s wife, daughter, mother doesn’t make her any less of an individual- she needs to nourish her soul. That comes first.
One of my biggest blessings in life and what I treasure the most is the unconditional love and support of my daughter and loved ones who stand by me, be it day or night, rainfall or sunshine and urge me to go and live my dreams. The memories we create through everyday conversations, a meal shared, a fabulous trip to Zurich last year is what makes life so colorful.
A few days back, I got a fabulous opportunity at work to travel overseas for 2-3 months, its a good role which will give me great exposure and add a few stars to my work profile. While I was basking in the glory of this opportunity and planned to take my daughter and mom along as well, I soon realized it wont work out. The thought of staying away from my daughter for a few months seemed like an impossible thing. I was secretly contemplating declining the assignment though to be honest the working woman in me was not happy with having to let go of a golden opportunity. That’s when my mom (who takes care of my daughter when I go to work) was insistent that I shouldn’t let go. I have always dreamt of and worked towards having a stellar career and when my efforts are being recognized and I am being presented with an opportunity of a lifetime, I just choose to give it up. Will that make me happy? Would I want to teach the same thing to Angel?
Finally I decided to take up the opportunity though I am not sure at this point about my and Angel’s emotions once I leave. I do not need to worry about her well being as she’s in the love and care of someone I trust more than my life- my Mom.
My biggest treasure in life is the love and warmth of my dear ones which propels me to do my best. Be it my best day or worst, I know there is this one place and a bunch of people I can come back to and always feel better-share my success and triumphs with, cry and vent out, talk the silliest things without a worry and just be me.