Woman’s Man #AtoZChallenge #BlogchatterA2Z

Posted in Aks Corner, AToZ Challenge 2018, family, Gender Equality, Love & Relationships, Parenting, Self Love, The Couple

The baby’s birth was a life changing event not just for Nysa and Arjun but all of us. As grandparents we felt equally responsible in caring for our grand kid and making life easier for our daughter. We did not want a situation where she had to forfeit her career for the sake of her child.

The dilemma we were facing once Nysa joined back work was – who would care for the baby during the day? Suraj was busy with his new start up, he had teething issues with the new set up and we knew it would be too much to ask him for a part time commitment on a regular basis at this stage. I could manage to get Flexi work but thats only after 4. At this point, Arjun was the one who came forward and offered to take a break from work. Shared parental leave is a concept thats not much heard of in India and his organisation flatly refused, saying that they could offer nothing more than the customary  2 weeks of paternity leave.

Arjun had been toying with the idea of starting something on his own but he kept postponing it due to fear of failure and loss of a stable job. Now was the time. He decided to resign from his corporate job, the grind was something he never enjoyed anyway. He would spend half the day with the baby taking care of him and once I took charge in the evening, he would commence work on his dream project.

Finance was not an issue as Nysa was doing amazingly well. They had their 3 bedroom ultra luxurious apartment, car and all the comforts, a good bank balance and were debt free. He brought out this topic before Nysa, me and his parents. We were taken by surprise but equally happy to see a father take charge of the baby.

Everyone settled very well into the new routine. While we were happy to see Arjun feed the baby his porridge, sing lullabies as Nysa clinched a multi million dollar deal- we realised not everyone were as happy and proud as us to see the roles of a husband and wife becoming fluid. Colleagues, neighbours, relatives- young, old, everyone had something to say. While some mocked at Arjun for being a hen pecked husband and eating his wife’s money, others looked at Nysa with disapproval for making her husband sit at home and dominate him.

The surprise element was our 60 year old Maushi (house help) who had never gone to school and lived in a patriarchal set up all her life. With tears in her eyes she told Arjun and Nysa “Didi bhaiya (sister and brother) may you continue to flourish . You have set a new precedence and I hope more people follow. Whats wrong if a man looks after his kids and the wife earns? Who said its supposed to be done in a particular way? ”

With time people got back to their business though we would continue to see those surprised looks when Nysa left for work with her handbag and Arjun and baby Dhruv waved her goodbye, dressed in pyjamas with a bowl of food in Arjun’s hand.

Image courtesy:pixaby

Linking up with #BlogchatterA2ZChallenge

a2z-h-small

My theme for the challenge is

“A slice of life through Myra’s eyes” – a fictional tale of growing up and learning some vital lessons about self love, feminism, sisterhood, a working woman and the essence of being a woman in urban India.   

Published by Akshata Ram

Chartered Accountant, Story Teller, Dreamer, Voracious Reader, Blogger, Mommy to a little munchkin, Shopaholic, Day Dreamer.Passionate about my career in the corporate world and aspire to break the glass ceiling, at the same time nurture my passion for writing. My niche area is short stories, I also write on parenting, sexism, life's experiences, micro blogs and flash fiction. I have won the best Parenting blog post at mycity4kids.com the largest parenting website in India, 4 times and several of my posts have been published in the #MostPopular category on this site garnering millions of views. I also write on Bonobology, Rivo Kids, Women's Web and Youth Ki Awaaz. My blog has been chosen as the Top Indian Blogs for the years 2018-2019,2020 by TopIndianBlogs website and found a place in the prestigious Top 22 Indian Literary Blogs in 2020 @TopIndianBlogs.

36 thoughts on “Woman’s Man #AtoZChallenge #BlogchatterA2Z”

  2. excellent message aks. I would really appreciate the stay at home dad. great to see cherry blossoms in their life. and the mausi needs a hug for being so advanced with her thoughts. love this episode.. towards the nearing, allmost everyone is being sentimental in their themes. well written. W is We Shall Overccome

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  3. I wish more people give up their false notions and adopt more practical solution the way Myra’s family did. A part of me actually feels jealous of Nysa, this girl has the cake and eat it too. She has a loving husband, amazing parents, great in-laws..who cares what outsiders are saying as long as your own family supports you. This is almost an utopian situation. I pray more girls get a life like Nysa. This girl literally has no conflict in her life..it is super smooth with everything falling in place. Good post Aks.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  4. That’s a great message you have woven in your story, Akshata! Hope more men see it that way. More than that, I hope the society welcomes stay at home fathers so that more men can step forward to share their parental responsibilities.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  5. As you already know Akshata, this is a cause I strongly believe in that every couple should get to choose what works best for them. So glad that Nysa and Arjun were not bogged down by societal pressure or inflexible bosses. A German friend of mine and her husband each took career breaks for one child at the time that worked better for each. Her husband took a career break for the first child between graduate school and a job and she for the second, when she was looking for a change in field.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    1. Thats great to hear Kanika! The good thing is I dont think its considered abnormal in western countries and they also facilities like shared parental leave available

      Like

      Reply

      1. It is in some European countries, Norway in particular. But US, not so much. Probably not as bad as it is here but not too great either. Maternity leave policies in the US are probably worse than in India.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. True I heard that but I heard organisations are more matured when it comes to gender diversity and career comeback opportunities are better there

        Like

  6. Of stay at home father’s we may probably find some trying to take that role seriously but the women too need to change their mindset. I know of a family where woman has a great career and supports the family whereas the better half doesn’t ..Yet they have issues. If you try to change, the society may not support and then it is a vicious cycle.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  11. Looking at people who break stereotypes with unapproving eyes is something I never understood. I understand why stereotypes exist but if someone is doing something different, why does it have be disapproved of? btw…Arjun sounds like a great guy!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  16. A very nice message you have delivered through this post. How long the women will compromise their career for the sake of taking care of the baby! Hope, the Indian society will understand the importance of paternal leaves(long-term) and our Govt. should sanction the law of paternal leave.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

Leave a comment