Stunned #AtoZChallenge #BlogchatterA2Z

Posted in Aks Corner, family, gratitude, Love & Relationships, Parenting, Self Love

This morning I woke up to a shocking news.  Rekha my neighbour had passed away from a sudden cardiac arrest. She had been busy wrapping up the kitchen work before she called it a night when she felt the pain in her chest. She collapsed and was rushed to the hospital where she was declared dead.

Life is fragile, but what really hit me hard is the probability that she could have been saved had she gone for a check up to the doctor.

I usually met Rekha on my way to work and we had a quick chit chat on weekends when I was not in a mad rush. She was a ]55 something lady who was always in a hurry, not because she had to go to work but because all the household chores were her primary responsibility, From cooking 3 fresh meals a day, a house  full of in laws, 2 grown up kids, a husband who always insisted on hot and fresh meals and a constant barrage of visitors which meant she was always scurrying to the kitchen to dish out something. She proudly announced to me “We always eat piping hot rotis and fresh vegetables, I cook twice a day, my hubby refuses to eat unless the food is cooked right before his eyes”.  I rolled my eyes in disbelief -seriously whats this with men and hot food, I wondered as I took out the rice from the fridge and placed it in the microwave.

To make this worse, the father in law was bed ridden and the mother in law too weak to care for him, which made it Rekha’s duty to be the caregiver here. She had been complaining of fatigue and some mild chest pain a week ago. I was alarmed and asked her to see the doctor but she waved it off dismissing it as gas trouble. “Who has time Myra I have relatives and need to make aam ras puri, will send some to your house too”.

The family looks shell shocked, its like the lifeline has gone away. I see her husband heat something in the microwave and gobble it up with tearful eyes. Is that regret over not caring enough for his wife or is it the worry that he will now have to eat stale food for the rest of his life?

I go to the kids and hug them “We never cared for Mummy, took her for granted, we should have helped her instead of demanding she cook our favourite  pav bhaji all the time , we should have made sure she rested, took care of her health, we had stopped looking at her as our mother. Its too late now”.

There is little I can say, I am not stunned anymore but I am sad, at the loss of a life. I will miss the cherry greeting, the smile and those little treats she used to send. But I know I will be vigilant now about my health, make sure I make time for the regular check ups and spread this message to all my near and dear ones especially my women friends and family who often put their health last, but have to pay a heavy price sometimes.

Linking up with #BlogchatterA2Z

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My theme for the challenge is

“A slice of life through Myra’s eyes” – a fictional tale of growing up and learning some vital lessons about self love, feminism, sisterhood, a working woman and the essence of being a woman in urban India.  

(Image courtesy: https://www.nextavenue.org)

Published by Akshata Ram

Chartered Accountant, Story Teller, Dreamer, Voracious Reader, Blogger, Mommy to a little munchkin, Shopaholic, Day Dreamer.Passionate about my career in the corporate world and aspire to break the glass ceiling, at the same time nurture my passion for writing. My niche area is short stories, I also write on parenting, sexism, life's experiences, micro blogs and flash fiction. I have won the best Parenting blog post at mycity4kids.com the largest parenting website in India, 4 times and several of my posts have been published in the #MostPopular category on this site garnering millions of views. I also write on Bonobology, Rivo Kids, Women's Web and Youth Ki Awaaz. My blog has been chosen as the Top Indian Blogs for the years 2018-2019,2020 by TopIndianBlogs website and found a place in the prestigious Top 22 Indian Literary Blogs in 2020 @TopIndianBlogs.

57 thoughts on “Stunned #AtoZChallenge #BlogchatterA2Z”

  1. Lovely story Akshata and a subject that can’t be stressed enough. Women need to take care of their health no matter what they are busy with, a career or home. And women need to educate themselves about symptoms of deadly conditions in women as they may not be familiar with these. the symptoms men experience are popularly known and not the ones women experience. no surprise there but we need to change it. Great post.

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  2. This is so touching aks. I can see something relating to this post in my family. My mom is a similar type. She is old today. My mom in-laws is also old. Time to give them a bear hug.. Lovely post. S is Six Sigma .

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  3. So many women are there like this lady in your post. They don’t care for them and always behind the family. To them family is the priority. Self care is much needed. I know once when one of my aunt indulged in self care, the uncle sarcastically told her that she is ignoring the family and indulging in social life. The aunt replied back that self is not being selfish. And she has done much for the family and she needs her space in private. Looks like, women have to change.

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  5. Brought out so nicely! But it is a universal Indian phenomenon, males or females, we never go to doctor until the last stage. Men or women won’t take a day off from work/ responsibilities. We are on a rat race always.

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  6. There are thousands of Rekhas around us, who dutifully carry out routine chores of managing home front and neglecting their health. An eye opener for all of us to not be another Rekha.

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  7. This is alarming. A wake up call for all of us. They teach a life lesson in flights. Help yourself before helping others.
    I have seen a lady, almost looking healthy, collapse in the middle of a festival and passing away shortly afterwards.
    So before handing over the any medicine to anybody, take ur calcium supplements. Rest, and don’t hesitate to ask for help from ur people.

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  8. The sad truth of life. I have seen it happening to a few ladies I personally know. They take care of everyone and everything, think that their household cannot run without them. Sadly, they never take care of their health and always place themselves last. Women should realise that if they are that important, their health is equally important too. Glad you raised this issue, Akshata!

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  14. All the burden on one really gets worse in the long run. Usually in India, where home stay mothers are usually and continuously doing work right from when they wake up before everyone to the time they sleep after everyone. Yet they are given the least credit. A strong message this one is.

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  15. That’s very sad to hear. Life in this generation has become really unpredictable, thanks to the lifestyle and lack of pure food. I am sure she would be quite active and would be doing her part of exercise through household chores, but still had to suffer.

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  16. It’s a sad truth, Indian women are conditioned to believe that they have to just take care of the entire family and not think of their own selves. I have to literally push my mother to ensure that she does not neglect her health. Very valid topic raised Akshata.

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  18. Oh, yes. That’s what most women do — put themselves at the end of their priority lists and then suffer from all the neglect. Making our health our priority — because no one else will — is what we need to remember always.

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  20. We take our health so casually unless the problem gets out of proportion we don’t consider ourselves as in need of the medical check-up. Crucial topic picked by you here Akshata.

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  21. A hard-hitting fact that health of women comes last in the priority list in many cases. Household chores, serving sizzling hot food takes the main priority than your dear one’s health and life is a questionable mark, which should be answered without any further delay.

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  24. What you say is very relevant Akshata. Housewives are often taken for granted and overloaded with stress and work. If they complain they are scoffed at and emotionally blackmailed. We only realise our mistakes when it’s too late.

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      1. Haha.. I am not a fitness expert Aks. It is just that I love to do exercises and sharing the same with others. That’s it.
        And yes we often neglect our self while taking care of our families. We should not do that.

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