The coffee date which made me cringe #WTFOW #Writebravely

Posted in Aks Corner, Love & Relationships, Self Love, Sexism, Write Tribe

I am more of a chai person but the joy of sipping a cup of frothy coffee laden with cream at Starbucks, Costa , Barista or good old CCD is something I always enjoy. Not all experiences in life are good though- just like some flavors of coffee which leave us with a bitter taste in the mouth. I had a series of such disastrous coffee arranged dates (I cringe using the word date!) when I set to choose my life partner the arranged marriage way.

A good  bunch of male friends but none who made my heart flutter- so I had to finally relent and look for Mr Special someone through the typical arranged marriage route. Things have changed drastically these days, instead of the girl carrying a tray laden with coffee mugs and parade herself before the would be groom and his family- the boy and girl choose to meet outside, in a cafe and take time to decide if they are really interested in taking it a step further.

Though 5 years back these experiences of meeting a couple of guys made me fume in anger, cry at times and even laugh hysterically, when I look back I realize damn! It makes for a great blog post. With a topic around coffee, I jumped at it and thought this would be an apt way of writing about my arranged coffee dates.

So Mr A was the first guy I met who was average looking but he had an innocent face, soft spoken and we instantly hit it off. Everything seemed to be going fine as we sipped  our latte at a CCD at Jayanagar. I couldn’t believe my luck that I had almost met someone I was so compatible with and that too in an arranged set up. And then he dropped a bomb. He started talking about his parents being conservative and how his bhabhi’s parents had given a flat and a car and though he is a modern and liberal guy, his parents are traditional and would expect such things. I was taken aback. I realized he is a spineless guy  and waved him goodbye forever.

Yet another encounter was in Barista Jayanagar again (I loved this place in Bangalore). The guy was late, I had already given him minus 10 for this, I was hungry and ordered myself a frappe. As I was sipping my frappe and enjoying the place, he came. All perspiring from head to toe, he  seemed totally lost and I thought he is suffering from a bout of amnesia. He almost spilled my coffee. He just sat there looking lost, he wasn’t talking so I had to do the talking part. I asked him the usual stuff, his replies were incoherent and I was getting irritated. Finally he revealed that he was least expecting this, his parents had hastily called him up this morning and coerced him to meet me. You are surely not ready for marriage, go home is what I told him and he scampered away leaving me with a dire need for an espresso shot now.

One of the most infuriating encounters was with a bloke who arrived before me and when I walked in his face  and hands were strewn with crumbs of bread. Ewww  I hated that handshake. The next half an hour was all about a conversation with a overconfident guy who went about enlightening me about why I must move to Australia with him after marriage and work there. At that point of time I was least interested in moving abroad. I told him about my intentions firmly but as you see some people never give up. Finally it was time to go, the coffee shop was overcrowded and short staffed. Most people were going over to the counter and paying the bill. The bill counter was overcrowded. Now dont get me wrong- I do not expect a guy to pay my bill every time but in the case of a first formal meeting or a date, it would be nice if he offered to pay. In fact I would love the idea of going dutch too. But this guy seemed in no mood to get up from his comfy seat and brave the maddening crowd of the billing counter. He would rather have the girl do the honors. That seemed a better thing to do than spend time with the idiot. So off I went and after a 10 minute struggle like the one at the ration shop, I managed to pay the bill and bade him good bye. No handshake please, just a wave this time!

There were quite a few other encounters but these were some that stood out. Though they left a bitter taste in my mouth, in hindsight it seems a colorful tale to share.

And I met my husband in CCD too! But thats another story for another day!

The prompt for Day 7 is if we were having coffee
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Also, Linking up with #Chatty Blogs from Shanaya Tales

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Published by Akshata Ram

Chartered Accountant, Story Teller, Dreamer, Voracious Reader, Blogger, Mommy to a little munchkin, Shopaholic, Day Dreamer.Passionate about my career in the corporate world and aspire to break the glass ceiling, at the same time nurture my passion for writing. My niche area is short stories, I also write on parenting, sexism, life's experiences, micro blogs and flash fiction. I have won the best Parenting blog post at mycity4kids.com the largest parenting website in India, 4 times and several of my posts have been published in the #MostPopular category on this site garnering millions of views. I also write on Bonobology, Rivo Kids, Women's Web and Youth Ki Awaaz. My blog has been chosen as the Top Indian Blogs for the years 2018-2019,2020 by TopIndianBlogs website and found a place in the prestigious Top 22 Indian Literary Blogs in 2020 @TopIndianBlogs.

35 thoughts on “The coffee date which made me cringe #WTFOW #Writebravely”

  1. It is funny to read but I can understand your anger and frustration. It’s good that first guy talked about his conservative family and his expectations in the first meet itself, else I cannot imagine how it can be for someone to marry that type of guy and be in a spider web.

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  3. Ha ha ! Glad you had a sense of humour to go through awful coffee dates . But you really learn a lot about a guy through one simple meeting. I think this is a far better way than online dating which can be totally deceptive . Glad your last CCD meeting had a happy ending. Loved this cup of coffee with you !

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  4. Although I never went through the boy matching process (thank god) I have been on a few dates via online dating sites and reading your post, reminded me of so many of them! I am actually glad to know its not just me who attracts these kind of guys but in general men are like this.
    The breadcrumB handshake is EWWWWW! I commiserate with you whole heartedly on that one. I hope you do continue this series and post some more intersting coffee dates 😉

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  12. Fifty shades tastes of manhood revelaed over coffee!
    Bitter experiences of past now hv turned out to be crispy and fresh tales!
    Engaging read!!!
    Anagha from Team Mocktailmommy
    htrps://mocktailmommies.blogspot.com

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  13. All those seemingly annoying experiences become funny anecdotes with time, don’t they? But looks like you have one of those coffee shops to think for your husband too. Will look forward to the tale 😉

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  17. Hahaha you seem to have met your share of frogs, before you met your prince.

    And you have me curious. I would love to read about how you met your husband.

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